About The Church of Chris Martin

ONCE UPON A TIME, A YOUNG MAN NAMED FATHER DROBBINGDON, A VERY UNHAPPILY MARRIED, HEN-PECKED HUSBAND & PREACHER, DISCOVERED A LOVE FOR COLDPLAY & REALIZED THAT GOD WAS CHANNELING MESSAGES TO HUMANS THROUGH THE BAND AND IT’S TALENTED AND PERSONABLE LEAD SINGER, CHRIS MARTIN.FATHER DROBBINGDON ROUNDED UP SOME PALS AND THEY TOOK OFF FOR THE GLASTONBURY FESTIVAL TO SEEK THE TRUTH OF CHRIS. WHILST ALL THESE SCOTTISH LADS FOUND WAS A WHOLE HEAP OF MUD, CHEAP HOTEL ROOMS, HORRIBLE ENGLISH FOOD AND BRIT LADIES WITH YELLOW TEETH, THEY DID COME TO A REALIZATION OF SORTS AND THE CHURCH OF CHRIS MARTIN WAS BORN!

FATHER SUFFERED THROUGH A MESSY DIVORCE WITH MOTHER DROBBINGDON A FEW YEARS BACK AND WENT THROUGH A NASTY MID-LIFE CRISIS. THE RANCOR OF THE SPLIT CAUSE OUR DEAR FATHER AND ARCH POPE TO FLEE THE CHURCH WITH PAMELA DD, (the church secretary) ALL THE TITHE MONIES AND MOST OF THE FLATTERING PHOTOS OF CHRIS. THOSE LEFT BEHIND WERE SHATTERED BY THIS BETRAYAL BUT SOLDIERED ON FOR THE LOVE OF OUR UK SONGSTER.  I AM ONE OF THE FEW THAT REMAIN AND CARRY THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ON MY SHOULDERS AS I STRIVE TO RECLAIM THE GLORY OF THE CHURCH OF CHRIS MARTIN! SOMEDAY ALL WILL BOW DOWN AS OUR CHURCH UNITES IN ONE WITH OUR SOUL MASTER AND WE ARISE IN A CLOUD OF GLORY TO OUR HEAVENLY COLDPLAY REWARD IN ETERNITY.

UNTIL THEN, I DO PRAY THAT YOU ENJOY THE STORIES, LYRICAL ANALYSIS AND INSIGHTFUL MUTTERINGS THAT ABOUND AT THE RESURRECTED CHURCH OF CHRIS MARTIN. VIVA!

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “About The Church of Chris Martin

  1. It’s Brotherob and I am so glad the church has risen again like the phoenix of ancient Egypt or whenever that was. I did google the church some time ago and got Go Daddy. The same server that hosts a website for child predators, only the church url was for sale?

    Anyway, I tried to register but never got an email back so I feel real hurt. Really.

    I have a great story about their last show here but will share that at a later date. I really want to see Katy Perry live. Preferably at my lace for the night! What an amazing talent she is.
    I’ll be back! Viva!

      • I just tried to log into The Church but was unable to complete the task. Maybe my seven year old daughter can help me, or my IT pal Frans the Apple certified everything hardware / software, computer / internet geek. I bought this red Samsung tube home stereo and it is the cats ass for listening to music, which I can do now a lot as my daughter is from now on with mummy for three days.

        Believe this… I went alone to their latest Friday night show here and took Charlotte my daughter – then six to the Saturday night show. Initiation by fire or what. Everything was great until just before they do the acoustic solo thing in the stadium corner, and where are the seats we have? Six seats level, away from them and Charlotte gets her foot caught in her seat and screams to go home… so we left just as they took the platform! The night before alone I was row three mid- stadium. Good luck or what eh? I told her when we went in if she freaked out for whatever we would leave. I had to keep my word for little Madoo… Chris would have done so I believe.

        Anyway I will soon have this login problem solved even if I have to get ANONYNOUS involved. I recently downloaded everything DONNA SOMMER and she just came on so I mus t go now…

  2. Chris has worked a miracle of faith that Brotheob has reappeared! Coldplay glory will always allow those true spiritual powerhouses to resurrect. It is a triumph of our great piety and beloved Arch Bishop Drobbingdon’s good karma that allows transfixed Rob to reappear while Coldplay the band is on hiatus and many souls are suffering for lack of new Coldplay music. Hallelujah!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s